(True story)

Sometimes we assume that people are like us, and while there are differences in the way we live our lives, at the core we’re similar. The things that make us laugh, the things that make us cry, the things we value the most, and the things we prioritise in life, like kindness, empathy, and generosity. We all believe these are the things that matter, right?

This assumption could either be wrong, or it could be that we meet people along the way who are sometimes angry at the world (essentially at themselves) that they lose touch with what makes us all human.

A couple of months ago, we had a young intern training with us for a couple of months. I was one of the team members who worked closely with him.

He was an interesting character. Sweet, obnoxious, naive, and annoying all at the same time. He was a handful! Teaching him was a stressful task because his ability to focus was weak, so we had to strike a balance between being assertive but also kind. Sometimes it’s a challenge, especially when you’re out of patience.

(Quick interruption. As I am writing these words, I actually feel I miss him. We had some fun moments and we laughed a lot.)

Back to the story…

Despite all that, he helped us a lot and did really good work. He was very keen on impressing us as a team, especially the team leader.

The team leader – let’s call her Silvia- and I were the only ones with him on his last day with us. Hours before he had to leave, he was talking to Silvia, showing her a piece of work he completed and told her that he wanted to add an illustration but didn’t know how to.

“You didn’t learn how to add an illustration?! What were you doing with us all this time then?!” He went silent… he was embarrassed. I could feel his heart sink all the way from my desk. In my mind, I prayed he would defend himself and list to her all the work he had done over the past few months. But he didn’t say a word.

Silvia left a few hours later, saying goodbye, but without thanking him for his work. I know he drove us to the edge of our sanity, but he deserved proper recognition.

After she left, he sat next to me and asked, “Do you think Silvia was happy with me? Do you think I was able to help the team?”

My heart broke. I felt so bad!

“Yes, of course!!” Then I started listing the things he had done and all the ways he helped us.

Again he asks, “But do you think Silvia was happy with me? Or not?”

“Of course she was, even if she didn’t say it explicitly. She’s just like that sometimes. But I am sure she appreciates everything you’ve done.”

He wasn’t convinced, and it was obvious my words didn’t console him.

A couple of months passed since that day. Now we’re in a team meeting online, and Silvia says, “I met Jake, the guy who knows our intern’s relative. He told me that our intern actually had Asperger’s syndrome!”

It was a surprise but not a shock to me. My gut feeling had told me while working with him that maybe he has some type of ADHD? But I didn’t ask.

Then Silvia said, “Maybe it would have been easier if we had known this beforehand. I do not know what that means.”

“Maybe it means that we need to be kind and patient with people because they might have something they do not want to talk about,” I said.

What she said next was the actual surprise for me!

“But we are not a social club.”

Thank you for reading another one of my adventures in the corporate world! Let me know what you think in the comments section.